Thursday, May 26, 2011

God is there even when you cant feel it!

This week has been very hard emotionally for Dave and I.  As I said earlier, we lost a good Godly man who was very special to us...His daughter put this on her face book.  It has touched me so very much....We expect God to give us blessings protection, healing, prosperity, and for God to ease our suffering...we get mad at God when we dont get the answers we want...God hears all of our prayers...sometimes we have to go through hard times to become the people that God wants us to be.  God is there....we should not doubt His love...Our healing may come through the tears, the pain, the trouble...

This song says it all....please listen to it..It is amazing...Get the tisssues!

Friday, May 20, 2011

It is time for us to step up and be the leaders....

It is Time To Step Up and Be Leaders
This has been a year of change for us.  A year of loss.  Not only of loosing weight, but  a year of loosing the great spiritual leaders that were a part of our lives.  My mom was the first.  My heart still hurts when I think about her being gone. So many time I reach for the phone and say..,"I've got to tell mom about that!" to reach back and realize...she is not there. We will also be loosing the house we grew up in.  This week we signed the papers for the sale of mom's house.  Although we know it is for the best, and we know that God picked the perfect family to move in there, we also know that as of July 22 we will no longer have a home to go home to.  It is bittersweet.  Another loss... The week after mom died Mr. D (our youth leader growing up) died.  He was the one that made our retreats fun...His singing, laughing and story telling were always special to me. 
This last week we lost another one of the Great Godly men from our life. Don Ensmenger has been a part of my life from as long as I could remember.  When I was a little girl he used to perform for us at church.  He always came over to our house for  lunch and he always shared with our family his desire to serve the Lord.  When I got to be a teen he used to perform at our summer camp. Everyone loved Mr. E. As Dave was interested in magic, Mr. E became his role model.  So much so that he wanted him to perform at our wedding.  As we moved from Albany back to WNY our friendship continued to grow.  Don was the perfect example of an evangelist.  Everywhere he went you felt like you were touched by God's presence. He lived his whole life with everything he had sharing the love of God with others he came in contact with. He was a a very special man.

As we stood beside his bed knowing that he was going to be with the Lord soon, we could just feels God's arms of protection around that man.  What an honor to be there when someone goes in the presence of the Lord. I think I have cried more over Don's death then any of the others.  I am not sure why.  Maybe because it reminded me of mom or maybe because I realized he was the last of the greats. I looked at Dave and said, "All of the prayer warriors are gone...who is going to pray...."  "All of the Great Godly influences in  my life are gone, who will I look up to.." As I stood by his bed in the last few minutes I thanked him for the wonderful Godly example he was in his life.  He was quiet and Solid, just like my dad.  In some ways, in the past 18 years he has taken the place of my dad.  He had wisdom that he would share and a heart of gold which he would reach out to anyone in need.  I told him Dave and I would not be the people we are today if it  was not for his Godly influence in our life.  His constant persistence of reaching others for the Lord.  I also told him it was time for Dave and I to step up to the plate and continue his journey.  We need to become the Godly leaders...We need to become the "Spiritually Strong"  We need to step up to the plate  and become the spiritual leaders that one day people will look up to.  It is kind of scary to realize that a whole generation is almost all gone.  We are now the older generation...We are the ones who need to pick up the Bible and start taking over where others left off.

Yesterday was also our Lifestyle change Bible study.  I was so looking forward to  it.  I needed my girls.  Needed to share all that I have gone through this week.  As I called the ladies the first one said she could not come, the second one said she could not come, one by one they were not able to make it. When Jeanette called and said she was not coming  I just started to sob.  I did not mean to, it just happened. I did not mean to make her feel bad, I just could not help it. As that Godly women prayed for me, I realized how lucky I am to have her in my life.  She prayed for peace. She also said God had something special planned for me.  As I got ready for my group I realized that I need to step up to the plate. I put a smile on my face and welcomed my guests.  Edith brought her sister in law.  What a character. She had just moved from Texas. She was so funny and we had such a good time.  I looked around my room and realized that God needed it to be just who we had there,  He knows best.  He is in control.  I was blessed by the people we had.  He is changing our group, refining it, and making us stretch.  I am so glad God is a better planner than I am.


Tuesday, May 10, 2011

This is what I said for Girlfriends day out!

My Journey to Transformation

I am Kathleen Jeffers, and I am on a Journey…not just any journey…but a Journey to transformation.   8 months ago I was not the person I am today… I had a disease…
My disease was different than any other…no one sent cards…saying praying …everyone could see it, but no one acknowledged it.  It is a disease that was slowly killing me…but no one, including myself were doing anything about it.
What was it…obesity…When I first looked at my doctors chart and saw those words…not just obesity, but extremely obese…I was offended.  I never looked at myself as obese…that is such a nasty word…. Fat Maybe…but more like big boned…or pleasantly plump as my husband used to say…but never obese.  I knew I was over weight…but  I did not feel it was a real problem.
A year ago my husband…who weighed 380  pounds at the time looked at me and told me…we need to loose weight.  I, who was over 270 pounds looked at him and said…what every good women says…”You go ahead honey…I will catch up with you later…You can do it!”  So he did…He started to exercise every night on an elliptical…Every night he would ask,  ”Do you want to join me?”  Every night I would say…”NO” 
See I was not ready. I had lost weight before….lots of weight.  An amazing thing happened…whenever I lost weight.  No matter how much weight I lost, I magically gained it all back and more…Kind of like a bonus!  I was not going to work hard to have that happen again.  Then, God started to work on my heart.  He used a book called "Slow but Sure!" Through this book, about another person that lost weight and kept it off, I was able to see that I could do it. 

I now had the desire but no idea how.  Exercise certainly did not appeal to me as it did my husband.  Although, at this time my husband was closing in on loosing 50 pounds, and still going with just exercise.  I was on face book and I saw a message from my niece, Fawn. She was saying she was going to work with this lady Audra and help her loose over 100 pounds.  As soon as I saw that I started to cry. I am too late. I wrote as fast as I could to Fawn saying, ”What about me? I need to loose weight to.  Will you work with me?”  She wrote back and said “Aunt Kathleen, I just happen to be arriving from LA to visit grandma next week…lets talk!”  So we did. We sat out on my moms deck and she told us her plan.  She made us look her right in the eye and make a commitment to her…As I looked her in the eye and said “I will do this!”  I had no idea what I was getting myself into.  The next day she was at my house with garbage bags. She was cleaning out my cupboards, my fridge, my freezer and every other hiding spot I had in the house.  She left none of my comfort foods.
Let me tell you, I felt like I was stripped of all my security. I was lost. She left me with one box of whole wheat noodles, one jar of sauce and fruit and vegetables.  As soon as she left, I stood at my cupboards and cried! Looking back now,  I thank God she was strong enough to do that. She did it not to a stranger, but to her Aunt Kathleen!  Sometimes…we have to be stripped of all of our securities before God can do a great work in us….
Then started the change!  We totally changed how we ate, how we exercised, and what we did.  We blogged on the internet and followed her instructions perfectly. Let me tell you this was a hard time to try to loose weight.  My mother, who to me was the most Godly, loving mom in the world, and my best friend, was dying.  I would go over to her house and there would be literally tables stacked high of goodies and food that wonderful people brought over to comfort us.  I never touched one of them.  When I start to get discouraged. I look back at that time and say, "If I could do it then, when my heart was breaking…then I can do it now!"
I started to loose weight…My husband and I became a team…we learned how to encourage one another…we started to exercise together and we started to love each other in a new way! When we went to Disney this fall with our girls…they had to ask us to slow down. We were accomplishing our dream of being in shape. We were leading the healthy lifestyle.
It was great…
I loved having my husband work with me but I had a burden for other ladies who I wanted to help… I knew just who I wanted in my group.  I did not need the holy spirit to tell me. I was in charge. I invited them all and would you believe not one of them came!  No  one came…accept one lady…a friend of my mothers who I met at the gym.  She and I met for six weeks We prayed for six people in our group  and every week none of my friends showed up.  I used to call them, hound them, and write on face book because I knew they needed help...but they never came. See God had other plans…when my mom's friend  went to Florida for a month I gave up my idea of a class.  I said this is a waste of time. I am not giving up time I could be working for nothing.

But God had other plans.  He wanted to chose who he wanted in my group. He wanted me to give it over to Him. It was only by me letting go that God could work.  He started to bring the people that he wanted in my life.  They just started appearing. I would be working at the gym and one lady asked me to please work with her on losing weight. Another God brought to me at the pool. she wanted to lose weight. My friend came back from vacation and I called her and told her we were ready to start up again…the first week as we were praying I stopped and looked Janette in the eye and said,  ”Look around!  We have exactly 6 people here! "  I realized at that minute that our ways are not His ways. He handpicked our group of ladies.  He knew who needed to be together and formed us into a family.  He has blessed us every week..  We have not only lost weight, 40 pound as a group in 5 weeks, but we are growing spiritually and emotionally.
Ladies if I can leave you with two things today, It would be these two things. First, God can use you in a mighty way no matter what size you are, if you are willing to do His will.  Second, If you are at a point in your life that you are ready to make a change…seek help. For years I struggled on my own! It is so much easier with a group of ladies working towards the same goal. Together we can accomplish anything God set before us.

Weigh in Day!!! We are still loosing

Weigh In Month 9
Dave Starting weight-- 380
Dave's starting weight with fawn- 330
Dave's weight last week 260
Dave's weight today- 258
Weight loss for the week- 2 pound loss
Total weight loss with Fawn- 72 pounds
Total weight loss- 122 pounds!!!

Kathleen's Starting weight-- 270
Kathleen's starting weight with fawn-260
Kathleen's weight last week 204
Kathleen's weight today-203
Weight loss for the week- 1 pounds
Total weight loss with Fawn- 57 pounds
Total weight loss-67 pounds!!!  YEAH!!!! (I want 70!!!)

Total weight loss this week 3 pounds
Total weight loss for Dave Kathleen combined. 189 pounds...closing in on 200 total loss!!!

We are still loosing...slower, but still losing. I really want to get below 200...but it seems like I get close and then gain again. I was talking to someone at the gym and they told me that I need to totally change up all that I am doing.  I need to be doing cardio every day. I am having a hard time getting motivated to go to the gym every day,especially when it is so beautiful outside.  I will see when I feel better what I can do.  She said she was stuck there for a long time too.  Once she broke the 200 barrier she started loosing regularly again.  I am hoping. Right now I just need to get better. I have been sick for two days. It is .not fun at all.
Dave is doing awesome.  He is going to the gym just about every day. He is looking real good!!! All of a sudden he looks very different.  He is HOT!!!  It is funny to see people notice him now...flirt with him.  I am glad we have a good relationship or I might be worried!

Monday, May 9, 2011

Mothers day with out a mother...

Mother's Day Without A Mother

This was the day I dreaded since mom passed away.  I was so thankful I had a ladies retreat to think about up until the day before mothers day. I had no time to worry about mothers day...to busy.  I had no time to think about how I had no mother for mothers day.  Saturday was Girlfriends day out.  I had been working on it for the last few weeks so  thankfully mothers day snuck up on me.  Saturday Dave came in and said, "I brought a present for you!".  He wanted to give it to me then...but I said ?Wait till mothers day...It will give me something to look forward to."  Saturday night Dave and I had a show...mother daughter banquet.  He asked me if I wanted to perform something. I really did not want to.  I did not want to talk about how special mothers were when I had none.  My talk would be depressing I thought.  When I came home Rachael had decorated the living room for me. She had made and put up signs all over the place Some said, "You're the best mom!", " Love you Mom!", "You rock mom", "Your a super duper ninja mom!"  It was awesome...It made me feel special. Sunday I woke up at 5am and walked outside just in time to see the sunrise.  It was as if God was saying "Good morning!" to me. Brandon sent me a message before church saying "Happy Mamma's day to the best mamma in the world."  Dave gave me his gift before church...a beautiful necklace that matched the earrings I had just gotten. On the way to church Becca told me she wanted to buy me breakfast at church. After church they fixed me steak salad and vegetables for lunch and they cleaned up to!  When Brandon came home he had gotten me a card with a poem he had written in it and some roses!  We then went to Sprague brook park.. Dave and I hiked through the woods, watched our girls play in the creek and just had a wonderful day!  It was fun!  Then Brandon and his friend came and we played football!  It was just a fun beautiful day. I had no time to be sad about mom. I had no time to think about my loss. I just spent the day enjoying the family that I still have.  I thank the lord for my wonderful family and how they went out of there way to make this mothers day special. When you are so busy thinking about all that you have, you do not have time to dwell on what you have lost.