We went on a date in the midst of the corona virus

I'm not sure about any of you but it seems that  Life as we know it has disappeared in the last 2 weeks. If you would have told me 2 weeks ago that there's no toilet paper, chicken, or loaf of bread to be found within 20 miles of my house I would have laughed. If you were to told me that schools and churches would close down and we are not supposed to leave our house 2 weeks ago I would have thought  that you were crazy. Life has changed so much.
We were so looking forward to today. Today would have been the day we got our baby chicks and ducklings for our 1st Easter shows that were booked for this weekend. I love the sound of the chicks and ducks in our living Room.  We have a special cage we always put them in with the heat lamp.  The best thing is to just sit and hear them chirping and playing. I would come down in the morning turn the fire on and just relax in my chair and listen to that wonderful noise.
That's not going to happen this year. 
2 weeks ago the chrona virus hit the United States.  At first everyone joked about it and said it was nothing to worry about. Then schools got shut down and life got scary and it began to seem very real. Then came the cancelations of our shows. 1st the nursing homes canceled because government shut down any visitors going into nursing homes. I panicked a little bit but knew we had lots of shows at day cares and libraries so we would be fine. In the 3 weeks before Easter we should have made $10,000. I work so hard to book those shows and was so proud that I made it to the $10,000 mark. That was my goal.  A few days later the government shut down all of the schools in all of the United States. I could no longer sub until our busy time. That also meant that our schools were canceled. I looked at our schedule and said OK we can still make it we have daycares and libraries. But then daycares started calling because the parents were just keeping all of their children at home as long as they had their school age kids. Next came the cancelations of the libraries is a government shutdown the library's. As I look at my calendar now every single show is crossed off.  Part of me wants to panic, part of  me went to scream why, and part of me doesn't know what to do. I try not to panic but we literally have no money and no way to make income.
Tonight Dave took me on a date. We are not allowed to go anywhere where other people are so we took a trip down memory lane. We took a drive to the reservation because gas is about half of what it is here.  Only $1,35 a gallon. We 1st passed my parent's house where I grew up. My daddy built that house. We saw the playhouse we played as children and  all the memories started pouring in. We the pass my uncle's house where we're always went sledding. Next was my cousin's house where we played in the woods.  We went into the village of Angola and Dave shared about all the people  that he knew. He shared memories from his childhood that I didn't even know. We passed the house where I was pregnant with my youngest daughter.  It was there that we brought home from the hospital. Next was the house that Dave grew up in. It was this house that I went  to when we were first were dating, the house where I got my first kiss from my honey at 16. We just kept driving and remembering and laughing. After we got gas we drove up to our 1st house. We had and old trailer and lived in a trailer park . We love living there. We thought it was a mansion. We were so in love and so poor but we are so happy. We talked about the kids that we useds to bring the church from the trailer park. We talked about all the memories, and we laughed. As we pulled into the driveway to our house that we've lived in for the past 20 some years, we felt like we had gone on a date. It was wonderful.  That night as we took our walk around the block we held hands and felt more in love than ever. These are scary times people. When Peter was walking on water he only started to sink when he took his eyes off from Jesus. When you feel like you are sinking and this craziness is overcoming you, take the time to just remember all the good times in your life. Remember the people that have meant so much to in your life.  Remember all the things you have overcome. Realize that this craziness is here just for a season. We will overcome it, we will stand strong and we will laugh and smile again.
My favorite verse is  Joshua 1:9
Be strong and courageous do not be afraid. Do not be discouraged For the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.

Healing my abused heart through art

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A piece of cinnamon toast a slice of the past
From as long as I could remember my mother used food to make us feel better. She was a giver. Her love language was making us something special to eat. I never realized how much that would affect me in my later life. Food became my comfort. Food became my reward for a job well done. Food became my way of knowing I was loved. There was nothing wrong with what mom did, it's just I allowed it to become a crutch as I was growing up.
  My husband and I are not sick very often. We are certainly not sick very often together. This last week both of us caught a stomach virus that stopped us dead in our tracks for 3 days. We literally did nothing but go from bed to couch to bathroom to back to bed for the last 3 days. Yesterday I woke up finally feeling like I was going to make it. I open up the windows in the house, cleaned, and filled the house with essential oils. I really had not eaten anything in three days. As I was there sitting on the couch I wanted something then I hadn't had for a long time. A piece of cinnamon toast. See my mom was one of those wonderful ladies that when make you feel so special when you are sick. She would mix eggnog and cinnamon toast and arrange the plate just right... so you knew you were loved. All I can think of is that's what I wanted. As I went to the kitchen and pulled out my whole grain bread and slipped it into the toaster I remembered all the times that Mom fixed us our cinnamon toast. I don't have any real sugar in the house so I grabbed my Stevia and made my cinnamon toast on the whole grain bread.  As I  took my first bite I was expecting so much. Sorry, it just wasn't moms cinnamon toast. It didn't do anything for me. Dave came down and said we need to get out of this house today. We decided to go to lunch at Olive Gardens. I was only able to eat two bites of salad half a bowl of my soup and breadstick. That was a must have eaten in 3 days so that was good. As we were there my son called and invited us over to see the baby. There's no better medicine then walking into a  house having a child run to you laughing and smiling like you are the most precious person in the whole world. My son greeted us and went into the kitchen.    I wondered what he was doing but concentrated on playing with Harrison.   At first I was a little frustrated that he wasn't with us, until I saw what he was doing. He was in the kitchen making cinnamon toast. He cut it just like my my mom, and brought it to us. We all satk in his living room eating that cinnamon toast. I looked at him and I said did you read my post about cinnamon toast this morning? He said no, I just know you needed it. I fed my grandson some cinnamon toast and told him about how special his great-grandma Burke was. How his daddy Made it just like she did so that I would feel better. Later that night I was talking to Dave and I looked at him and said I never wrote anything about the cinnamon toast, I can't believe he made for me. It had probably been 12 years since we sat down in mom's house and had cinnamon toast together like that. I wrote him last night and told him how much it meant to me.  His response..."Mama I will always make yo

u cinnamon toast".  To see moms love language passed down to one of my children is so special. For just a moment it wasn't just a piece of toast it was a slice of the past.