Isn't Chistmas a time to celebrate...Don't feel like celebrating!

Isn't Christmas a Time to Celebrate? I don't Feel Like Celebrating.

NO this is not my house...I have no decorations out this year!!!

This Christmas Season has been different than any other we have ever had.  We are attending Hamburg Wesleyan, but we have not had time to get involved in a small group.  The past three years, while Dave was the children's director,  I was in charge of the Christmas Play, the giving Tree, and attending lots of holiday Celebrations.  This year we are not a part of anything.  I feel like we are missing out of a whole part of Christmas.  We also are dealing with the loss of my  mom.  As I sat in church this Sunday singing the beautiful Christmas songs, I longed for my mom.  She always spent Christmas with us, went to Christmas Eve Service with us and was there to make sweet rolls, read the Christmas story, and open gift with us.  Since Dave's mom died she has made it a habit  of coming to our house...so we would not be too lonely.  I think it was the reading of Luke 2 during the service that it hit me.  I could hear mom saying the verses from memory, just as if she was saying it as Brandon read it.  I could hear her singing the Christmas Carols with us.  I thought, Wow, mom would have loved this!  I started to cry.  I closed my eyes and the voices around me sounded so beautiful, so full of worship and love...then it hit me.  I am wishing her back.  It was almost as if she said to me, "Honey, I know you miss me, but I have such a wonderful day ahead of me. You think you know how to celebrate Christmas!  What an awesome  celebration we will have up in Heaven, on the most wonderful day of the year!"  I looked around and realized it was true.  Mom is going to have the best Christmas ever!  She gets to celebrate Jesus' Birth with Jesus himself....WOW!  That is amazing. I know my heart will miss her sooo much.  There will be many tears shed this year but there will also be the knowing that mom is in such a better place...that she is going to have her huge smile on her face, and singing her heart out for her Lord and Savior on this wonderful Birthday Party up in heaven.